H
Common operating system
Honor
Respect, duty, competence, and trustworthiness. Often expressed through action, reliability, and a willingness to carry responsibility.
A Christian marriage field guide
Stop keeping score.
Start building covenant.
Your marriage is not a spreadsheet. It is a living connection between two people. From Contract to Covenant gives Christian couples a practical framework for replacing tallying with understanding, responsibility, and shared mission.
✓ About 75 digital pages
✓ One evening to finish
✓ 14-day guarantee
Instant PDF download after purchase. One-time purchase, not a subscription.
The core shift
From “Who owes whom?” to “What are we becoming together?”
Inside the ebook
Six chapters. One better way to love.
This is not a book about winning an argument. It is about understanding the connection you have been trying to maintain, protect, and improve.
Practical teaching
A marriage is a network, not a spreadsheet.
The differences between spouses describe the terrain of your marriage. They do not determine its destination.
1
Every Marriage Runs on a Network
Marriage as an active connection between two operating systems, why a shared protocol lets information pass between them, and why every network needs maintenance.
2
The Scorecard Marriage
How private scoreboards grow from ordinary moments: money, chores, intimacy, career decisions, and the myth that contribution can always be reduced to fifty-fifty.
3
Where Covenant Actually Comes From
Genesis 15, Hosea, Malachi, and Ephesians 5:33. Why covenant absorbs failure, defines identity, and must be remembered and renewed.
4
What Covenant Actually Requires
The recurring daily decisions: speaking kindly, assuming good faith, staying present, raising concerns without threats, and practicing forgiveness.
5
Friendship: The Network’s Load-Bearing Wall
Why couples can remain deeply committed yet quietly miserable, and why friendship carries the marriage when romantic intensity, energy, or health changes.
6
Building the Network Before You Need It
Build and maintain connection in ordinary seasons so it is present and strong when a crisis arrives.
N
Common operating system
Nurture
Connection, empathy, and emotional attunement. Often expressed through attention, presence, tenderness, and responsive listening.
Neither system is superior
They were designed to work together.
Each can cover for what the other lacks. Differences do not make either spouse defective. They reveal where the connection needs a better protocol.
01
Notice the pattern
Name the scorecard without weaponizing it.
02
Translate the need
Move from criticism to a clear, respectful request.
03
Practice the protocol
Build habits that keep the network connected.
Course feedback
Thoughtful people found the framework both deep and usable.
These are reviews of the six-lesson video course, not of the $5 ebook.
“
The insights I gained helped my clients create healthier communication patterns. Very well done, thank you! I thought the “hacking” and “operating system” analogies were clever.
Jessica L.
Marriage Coach
“
A Powerful Biblical Framework That Transforms How Couples Understand Each Other!
Frank H.
Online Reviewer
“
Centered on Epistle to the Ephesians 5:33, it clearly explains sacrificial love and strengthening respect in a balanced, practical way.
Lynn W.
Relationship Blogger
“
The practical strategies provided helped my own relationship flourish remarkably and the insights I gained helped my clients create healthier connections.
Kevin M.
Marriage Coach
“
It's easy to follow, but there's still enough depth to make you think and look at things from a different angle. It's not just something you breeze through and forget — it actually sticks with you.
Mike C.
USA
“
The idea of honor and nurture as different operating systems gave me a new lens for understanding conflict. It encouraged small, intentional habits rooted in faith, reminding me that strong marriages are built through practice, humility, and daily grace.
James P.
Counseling Professional
What you will be able to do
Replace hidden calculations with honest connection.
The ebook gives you shared language for conversations that often drift into defensiveness, bookkeeping, or silence.
01
Recognize the scorecard
See how ordinary disagreements become private records of what each spouse believes they are owed.
Benefit: Less resentment hidden beneath daily life.
02
Understand two operating systems
Recognize how honor and nurture can interpret the same behavior in very different ways.
Benefit: More empathy without surrendering truth.
03
Speak covenant language
Learn what daily love looks like when it is treated as an identity and a promise rather than a mood.
Benefit: A clearer standard for repairing conflict.
04
Protect the friendship
Build the kind of friendship that remains supportive when energy, health, or circumstances change.
Benefit: A stronger connection beneath the marriage.
05
Build before crisis
Maintain the network in ordinary seasons so it is ready when pressure rises.
Benefit: Less scrambling when conflict arrives.
06
Choose a next practice
Use the ebook as a bridge to the complete book series, workbook, video course, and 34-day practice.
Benefit: Insight that can become a shared habit.
Next step after the ebook
Turn the idea into a practiced marriage rhythm.
The six-lesson video course pairs the teaching with a couple’s workbook, printable handouts, a simple weekly exercise, and a bonus 34-day lesson.
6
Video lessons
About ten minutes each, with pastoral counselor Dan Blakeslee.
$19
Complete course
30-day risk-free money-back guarantee.
- ✓ Contract vs. Covenant Assessment
- ✓ Couple’s workbook and printable handouts
- ✓ One simple weekly couple exercise
- ✓ Bonus 34-day lesson
Opens the course website in a new tab.
Your shared work
From one framework to one conversation.
1
Watch
Learn a short lesson together.
2
Discuss
Use the workbook to make it personal.
3
Practice
Choose one small action for the week.
4
Continue
Carry the habit into the 34-Day Reboot.
The Relationship Hacking books
Explore the rest of the Relationship Hacking series.
Daniel Blakeslee is the bestselling author of the Relationship Hacking book series. The books are written for couples in other stages of life — including second marriages and military couples — and are available on Amazon.
Explore the rest of the Relationship Hacking seriesOpens Amazon in a new tab. Daniel earns a commission from sales made through this link.
From insight to repair
Learn the cycle that helps ordinary hurts heal quickly.
The Rapid Repair Cycle gives couples a concrete sequence for responding to harsh words, forgotten promises, and ordinary misunderstandings.
P
Pause
Stop the cycle and create space to respond thoughtfully.
A
Acknowledge
Name what happened and how it affected your spouse.
R
Take responsibility
Own your part without “but” or deflection.
R
Repair
Forgive freely and ask what would help.
R
Reconnect
Restore closeness, including a gesture of prayer when appropriate.
The continuation path
Keep the connection strong with the 34-Day Relationship Reboot.
For couples who finish the course and want to continue practicing, the Christian Edition provides 34 daily lessons, seven phases, and a printable participant workbook.
1
Reflect
Notice what is happening below the surface.
2
Realign
Return to shared purpose and expectations.
3
Reconnect
Practice presence, respect, and repair.
4
Renew
Strengthen friendship, prayer, and covenant.
5
Repeat
Carry the habits into maintenance.
After the course
Make the new patterns part of your marriage.
The workbook includes practical tools such as a conflict recovery protocol, a weekly marriage meeting template, a reboot agreement, and a 90-day maintenance plan.
Honest answers
Before you begin, here is what this material can and cannot do.
Good tools begin with clear boundaries.
No. The point is to understand the patterns operating between you, take responsibility for your part, and build shared habits. Covenant is mutual. It asks both spouses to love, listen, repair, and remain faithful.
No. The honor and nurture “operating systems” are broad-brush generalizations meant to open a conversation, not diagnose every couple. The material is written for healthy, heterosexual Christian adults, and each spouse still needs to be understood as a whole person.
It is about 75 pages, including the bibliography and author pages, and is short enough for a couple to finish in an evening. It provides the central framework and points you toward the books, workbook, course, and longer practice for greater depth.
A standalone digital PDF ebook, available for instant download after purchase. Your purchase is a one-time $5 transaction, not a subscription.
No. This material is not a substitute for professional care. Unconditional covenant is never a cover for abuse, neglect, or betrayal. If abuse is present, seek qualified help and protection without delay or guilt. A pastor or qualified Christian counselor can provide the appropriate support.
14
Days
Satisfaction guarantee
Read it. Discuss it. Decide with confidence.
If From Contract to Covenant is not right for you, request a refund within 14 days of purchase.
The starting point
Read one evening. Change the way you talk about marriage.
The ebook is the concise introduction to the Relationship Hacking framework. It gives you shared language, a clearer theology of covenant, and a place to begin.
Best used together
Download the PDF, read one chapter, and discuss one question as a couple.
Digital PDF ebook
From Contract to Covenant
Daniel Blakeslee
$5
USD · one time
- About 75 digital pages
- Six practical chapters
- Instant download after purchase
- 14-day satisfaction guarantee
- No recurring subscription
Secure checkout. Your PDF will be available for download after purchase.
No pressure. Just a clear next step.
The best time to build a stronger network is before you need it.
Begin with the framework. Continue with the practice.
The ebook is a modest $5 and a serious, practical beginning. If you later want guided video lessons, printable tools, and a longer shared practice, the course and Reboot are ready when you are.
Start With the Ebook — $5
About the author
Daniel “Dan” Blakeslee
Dan is a pastoral counselor and speaker based in Virginia. A former Navy submariner and Chief Petty Officer, he has counseled couples for more than thirty years.
Dan and his wife Michele have been married since 1981 and have two daughters. His work is grounded in practical communication, spiritual formation, and the everyday work of building a healthy marriage.
A marriage is a network
Protect the connection before conflict tests it.
Get the complete $5 ebook and begin replacing scorekeeping with shared covenant, clearer communication, and a stronger friendship.
Instant PDF download · One-time purchase · 14-day satisfaction guarantee